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I have stopped blogging recently because I feel like I don't know what to say.  I have run out of optimism (and I never had much to begin with).  I know not everyone wants to hear or read about my problems.  A lot of people have much bigger problems.  I get that.  But it's hard not to feel down when I can't catch a break.

I was wishing I had a stronger faith, that all of this is for some greater purpose, but it's hard to have faith that things will be better when I just keep getting knocked down.  Aside from all of the recent health problems keeping me down, my job is now in jeopardy because of my health.  Although it's not my dream job, it occupies my time, keeps my mind off of my own issues.  I have little hope that things will ever be "better".  It seems like every time  I think I've hit the bottom, it's only just the beginning.

I hate having to say no to things because of my health.  I feel like I miss out on so much because I am not able to do it, or because I don't feel well enough.  

Sorry to complain so much.  Maybe things will take a better turn soon.


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